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Sliding Doors- My Analysis of Small Things

Monday, October 26, 2009

I found this amazingly perfect little pinecone bundle in our yard. But not before almost stepping on it & presumably crushing it to bits.

It struck me. Isn't this how life is? Don't we often miss the little things?

At less than 5'2" I kind of always felt like this was me. Small & getting missed. I mean being short is torture in elementary school when you line up by height- I was always the last in line. Or for athletic teams- I was always the last picked. It's not great for nicknames either- I answered to Runt, Weezer, Baby Allisa, Peeroy, and Sprout.

Somewhere at some point I began to embrace smallness- maybe it's when my future husband began calling me "per square centimeter," (short for the strongest person per sq. cm) or when I realized I could save a buck buying clothes & shoes in the kids department. Either way, I finally accepted that I would never ever be referred to as "tall & lanky."

Now that I'm 30 and of course much wiser, I've looked back on my life to take stock. I found that in addition to all the huge, magnificent events I've experienced- there are hundreds of little, tiny choices/moments/flickers in time that undoubtedly set me on the course I've taken.

So, like my own smallness, I've come to really appreciate the very teensy- at the time perhaps unnoticeable- things that can alter life's course of events.

Here's my truncated little story:

senior in college. surprised to find myself even that far. not much in the way of dreams. get married soon? probably. attended a super bowl party in the small town i spent part of my childhood. surrounded by professional rodeo cowboys. sitting on a saddle. thought to myself, 'holy hell- this is as good as it will ever get for me.' went home. cried. and cried. called my friend. said i lost faith in cowboys. he said, "well, put your faith back where it belongs."

that's it. all i needed to hear. woke up next morning on a mission. mission to make something of my life. at campus coffee shop saw an acquaintance. what are you going to do with your life? i asked. he told me. said you should apply too. when is deadline? tomorrow. oh. so i skipped classes. completed application. convinced professor to speed write recommendation. 4 months later accepted to Teach for America.

more than I ever thought I'd achieve in life. trained in texas. moved to california. became a teacher. found my calling. met my husband.

put my faith back where it belongs.

{{{ it's the small things, really.}}}

What are you small things? I'd love to hear!